My friend and colleague Mitzi Starkweather, portrait photographer extraordinaire, has been through her own recent batch of transformative experiences, which she is completely transparent about, and they led her to offer a special type of portrait session where people show up, as they are, and are photographed. All Black and White. No Styling. No Posing. No Retouching. The experience has gained some traction for her, and she wanted to take the next step and offer it as a course. She asked me for my help in giving her feedback as she develops it. Of course I said yes. I adore and respect her. I’m here to help.

But THEN.

THEN she said…”while you are here, I would like to invite you to have your own session.”

Literal panic set in. Ho Lee Schneikes.

Remember those body image issues I mentioned earlier?? Yeah those. And she wants me to what?? Oh, Lordy.

Led by my heart instead of my head, I said ‘yes’ before I could talk myself out of it. I am an overthinker, you see. I overthink until projects and ideas tend to die before they even have a chance. Yet, I felt the nudge. Something told me to DO. THE. THING.

So, that is what I did. 

Ready or Not, I LET GO.

Best. Decision. Ever.

The Experience I Didn’t Know I Needed.

That says it all. But I will elaborate.

I am a control freak. I have always done my own self portraits as a matter of education and convenience, so giving up control is not always the easiest thing to do. Not to mention, I had been struggling with body image issues in recent months. Middle Age happens.

While I have not have yet attained my financial, physical or spiritual goals, this experience was a *necessary* step in healing, and releasing all of those self-imposed criteria I thought I had to meet in order to deserve happiness. I honored myself as I am NOW, so I can show up for myself and others, unencumbered by the self-imposed prison I had allowed the external world to help me build.

I am a work in progress, and though I likely will falter and have those darker moments, ( I am human, after all) this experience has unlocked something in me. And when I feel the heaviness of the self-criticism, I will have my album as the key to remind me of what unbridled joy looks and feels like.

And I want that for YOU.